


i've been thinking lots about your mouth

by TheGoliathBeetle



Category: Free!
Genre: Angst, Cheating, Future Fic, Heartbreak, Infidelity, M/M, MakoHaru Week 2016, Tokyo (City)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-18
Updated: 2016-09-18
Packaged: 2018-08-15 15:50:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8062390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGoliathBeetle/pseuds/TheGoliathBeetle
Summary: They all had such big dreams. Then everything went wrong. Makoto and Haruka find solace in each other, even though they shouldn't. .For MakoHaru Week 2016.Prompt: AU..I've interpreted the prompt loosely.





	

**Author's Note:**

> For MakoHaru Week 2016  
> Date: 18th September  
> Prompt: AU
> 
> .
> 
> The title is a lyric from a song called “Talk” by The 1975.

_Slow down_   
_Yeah, I want you_   
_She does a little bit on the sly that shows what she's up to_   
_She started talking about missing him_   
_She was glistening_   
_It won't mend your heart if it's only a couple of lines_

-Milk by The 1975

* * *

 

Tokyo moved so fast, from night to day, bright lights, bright people, the clouds, the car, the sun. Makoto drove past yellow street lamps in the buzzing darkness, coughing past the smoke and the sound of horns and talking. Talk, talk, that's what people did. He wasn't sure what for, wasn't sure how, when the most he ever said, the most he ever did that mattered was with skin on skin, saliva, and sheets.

When Haru opened the apartment door Makoto pounced, desperate to quiet the something inside him that rattled like a restless prisoner, and Haru took him full on the mouth. The door slammed shut, the buildings were quiet and impassive, holding their secrets even through their windows, and those that chose to look would find only curtains and drapes and lies.

They fell on the couch together, a book Rin was reading pressing into Makoto's back, almost demanding his attention. Makoto ignored it in favour of ripping Haru's shirt off, biting his neck, but not too hard, because marks could be seen and what happened here, what happened now, would lie with the millions of other stories of infidelity that people buried themselves under, picking out the pieces of their lives from someone else's underwear, hair in the bathroom drain, messages going unanswered.

How many times must Rin have texted, _will be home late_ , and how many times had Haru texted, _Rin's gone Makoto, come over._

These weren't things to obsess over while falling onto another man's bed, fucking his boyfriend to settle something screaming and broken and lonely inside their hearts. Why were people so goddamn fragile?

* * *

It was never meant to be this way. Life didn't follow the script they'd written, a story so carefully angled to only one outcome. It was to be Makoto and Haruka, and Sousuke and Rin, with their little dreams protected in their little, fragile hearts, nurtured and warmed and grown to maturity.

It was supposed to be Rin and Haru on an international stage, swimming against every doubt they'd had about themselves, swimming to Olympic medals, swimming to freedom. Sousuke's wings had been clipped with his shoulder, but he was supposed to recover. And Makoto, Makoto, he knew he would be with Haru, knew he would train kids in a sport he had grown to love.

That was how it would be. In an alternate universe where things worked out, where nothing broke, nothing fell.

* * *

But here they were now, Haru and Rin, together, Sousuke and Makoto, together, and their lives collapsing in on them. No Olympic dreams were made in this apartment, not with these cheap bedsheets, not with this peeling plaster. Not when Rin worked as a police officer and Haru worked as a baker and neither of them made love, or even conversation anymore.

And what was Makoto's excuse, showing up here at ten past midnight? Sousuke in an alcoholic slumber on their bed, his shoulder useless not from injury but the simple lack of resolve. How did this happen? How did any of this happen?

* * *

" _I need you_ , _"_ Haruka whispered to him on another night like this, _"It should have been you._ " Makoto almost wondered if that was a confession, if this was love. But how could love come at the cost of so much dissatisfaction?

That was the human thing, wasn't it? The restless, endless search for more, more, more. And maybe Makoto was just another acquisition to Haru, just collateral damage in his need, his want, for just a little whiff of a future that could have been.

* * *

" _I love you_ ," Makoto had said once when Sousuke was in the kitchen and Rin was in the bathroom. Four plates of food had been eaten that day, a dinner party that was supposed to be an anniversary celebration. _"I love you like the stars."_

But stars were just so far away, beautiful from only a distance too great to see them for what they really were: fire and heat and raw power just burning away, surrounded by planets and moons that worshipped them, but none that could truly touch them and survive.

* * *

In another reality they would have been happy, Haru and Makoto, Sousuke and Rin. But here they left a trail of tears and lies and "he's gone, you can come over"s. In another place all their dreams would have come true, kisses like butterflies and touches like eagles, and the whole world at their feet.

But this was not an Olympian house, and Makoto was no swimming coach, and Sousuke was a cripple, and Tokyo was a loud, bright, endless place.

* * *

Makoto rolled to the side of the bed, swung his legs over, and just sat there, tears rushing down his face.

Haru, recovering from his orgasm, just panted and stared at the ceiling.

* * *

There was nothing else to say.

**Author's Note:**

> This is definitely not what anyone had in mind for the prompt “AU”, but I tried writing a couple (including an airplane AU, a college AU and a train commuters AU) and nothing seemed to work. Then I was listening to The 1975 (love, love that band), and this just hit me. I know it’s super sad (what a way to start MakoHaru Week), but I’m finally pleased with it. 
> 
> Also, I’m not sure this falls under nsfw…?
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading :)


End file.
